In a recent viral Reddit post on the r/AmItheA-hole thread titled, “AITA for not helping my parents when they are homeless?“, user u/[deleted], recently asked in the forum if she was a bad person for not giving her broke and homeless parents money.  She goes on to explain that over the years her parents have made many financial mistakes and poor business decisions that led them down the road to homelessness.  She has offered them advice in the past and even tried to stop a fraudulent business deal that they fell victim.  However, her parents refused to listen to her advice, even when their financial state spiraled out of control.  Instead the only help they wanted from her was money.  In the Reddit forum she explains: 

“My parents are terrible with money. When I (27F) was little my father gambled away all the saving about $100,000 in risky penny stocks which got wiped out in 2008 and we were forced to move into a single bedroom in a house for the 3 of us. Then my mom fell for an MLM and you can image what happened, they lost the down payment to the house they were saving for. I begged them not to sign up for it since I saw it was clearly a scam and showed them evidence it was and they just laughed at me and ignored me.

They lost about $28,000 from that. Then recently they fall for a college signup scam and lost $32,000. They weren’t signing up for college they just needed a loan and tried to go though a “private broker” who promised to get them a school loan that they would use on whatever they wanted. I went with them to see the broker and told them it was a scam and they ignored me. So basically they were trying to scam the government and got scammed instead. I actually tried to pry the pen away from my father hands when I got desperate as he was writing down his bank info and SSN and he screamed at me I was embarrassing him and did it anyway.

Again they lost money and now they are homeless because their credit is crap and they can barely afford even crappy apartments. They probably can’t get that money back since they have little documentation on the broker and what he promised. Now they live in their car and are begging me for money. I have about $100,000 saved waiting to buy a house and they know about it because I stupidly told them I was saving for a house and now are calling me and showing up at my apartment asking for money. They also want to move in in the meantime but my roommate and I agreed visitation from friends or family is max a week to prevent resentment and if my parents move in they probably will refuse to move out. They are going to food pantries and honestly I can’t find it I’m myself to be that sympathetic since they don’t listen to me until they need my money.”

At the time of this writing, the post had over 17K upvotes with most commenters agreeing that she is not the A-hole. Commenters expressed concerns for the daughter. One commenter, Antstst said, “DO NOT, DO NOT give them money. You know exactly what’s going on. You know what will happen. You’ve had to write three solid paragraphs to get through the bad decisions they’ve made in the past. You cannot save them from themselves. They are a bottomless pit and they will bleed you dry–and still end up homeless.” While another commenter, Thundernutz79 agreed and warned, “Make sure your credit is ON LOCKDOWN. Parents will typically have everything they need to open an account in their children’s names. If you don’t give them anything (and you shouldn’t) they may take it upon themselves to get something from you.”

Other Reddit commenters offered solutions to how the daughter can help her parents.  Commenter, Ok_Network_1813 said, “if it’s eating away at your conscience, don’t give them the money in cash. Gift cards, and direct payments to utilities and rent.”  Commenter Fanny_Eubanks said, “Exactly my thoughts. Offer to buy them a meal or take them to the grocery store for the necessities.”

There were over 1.3k comments, discussing various ways many other people have had their credit ruined and have been taken advantage of by cash strapped parents.  Most of the comments can be summed up by commenter mps435, who said, “Sometimes the only way a person will learn to help themselves is to hit rock bottom. Let them figure this out on their own.” 

What do you think? Leave a comment below.

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